It’s curious. In life, no path can lead to success if you want to avoid the paths that lead to failure. Only by knowing (and living) the defeats, can victory be achieved.
The blessings of life certainly require work, patience, effort, and skill, but this alone is not perfect. It is essential to “bite the dust” of misfortune and the pain of loss.
On the other hand, knowing how to process failures not only allows you to achieve success, it also defines the degree of satisfaction and the way in which victory is enjoyed. Because those who do not process misfortune well, reach the goal very affected and are unable to enjoy its rewards.
Therefore, it is not a matter of “overcoming” failures, it is necessary to know how to process them.
The latter is facilitated if you become aware of two basic aspects:
1. There is NO type of success without experiencing failure.
2. many failures must be experienced before reaching success.
If these two facts are assumed naturally, life meekly delivers the prizes that are asked of it.
Now, assuming this “naturally” means doing it with the same spirit that is adopted for success. It is necessary to process failures with significant doses of acceptance and contentment. Accept is the antonym of rejection. And being happy is the opposite of grieving over the loss.
It is clear?
If failure is rejected, victory is automatically rejected. If you are unhappy with the loss, the gain will not bring you satisfaction either. This is the way it is, and it will be known what kind of design these laws obey.
Carl Jung used to say: “what you resist persists.” when the loss is rejected, the event repeats itself, the conditions worsen, and the misfortune does not cease. And when the bad moments are not processed calmly and happily, they embitter the soul, disabling it to enjoy the victory.
Acceptance and contentment. Those are the ingredients for processing failures. To this, you can add a good dose of faith and patience, but after having mastered the first. Faith is firmly anchored in the future, but it never exempts you from the stumbling blocks of the road. Patience is essential to have time as an ally and not as an enemy, but it has little power if it is not preceded by healthy acceptance and contentment with what is happening.
It takes a lot to accept setbacks in life, and it is even more difficult to do so with some joy. For this very few can consider themselves genuinely blessed. Well established by the biblical statement, narrow is the path of the elect.
The miner gladly accepts the existence of the tons of earth and rock that hide the precious gold nugget he is looking for. He never rejects the existence of the dunghill, nor does he assume a proportional relationship between it and the precious metal. He knows well that the earth is a gentle guardian of the reward it seeks.
Is it difficult to collect, transport, or store gold nuggets? Absolutely! The difficult thing is to process the tons of earth, mud, and stone that shelter them. In this, the expertise of the miner is required.
Human beings distinguish themselves in the way they process failures, never in the success they have achieved. Because when victory eventually occurs without the cost of defeat, it comes tied to a chain of condemnation. The lucky person suffers a lot just thinking that they can lose what they have obtained.
Whoever achieves what he wants after having serenely accepted the cost of failure, is not afraid of losing what he has obtained. For this reason, he has no attachment and is free.
Because sad is living attached to what you have. It is a manifestation of the mentality of scarcity and misery. Nothing more.
Some will say: life gives and life takes, for this very reason … blessed be life. But it’s not like that. Life always gives. What happens is that it gives profit and loss. If the former is not processed the same as the latter, the feeling of a dichotomy arises.
Processing failures is an art, but it is an indispensable one for life. There is no science for it. It is a matter of attitude. Nothing comes free in existence, much less success. And its cost is not work, sacrifice, knowledge or skill. Its cost is failure.
Does this mean that defeat must be found tasteful? Not necessarily. But it must be assumed with the same ease that is available for victory. With that peace of mind that never denies reality, whether it is what you want or not.
The “ethos of the warrior” affirms that wisdom consists in accepting reality as it is, not as one would like it to be, and the courage to act coherently with it.
Wayne Dyer, when referring to the idea of a person without “wrong zones” said:
“When you are close to a person free of Erroneous Zones, you can see the absence of regrets and even passive sighs. If it rains, they like it. When it’s hot they enjoy it instead of complaining. Whether they are in the middle of a traffic congestion, or at a party, or all alone, they are simply doing their best. It is not about enjoying everything that happens, but about a wise acceptance of what is, a rare ability to delight in reality . “
Possibly this statement contains the substance to process failure: acquiring that rare ability to delight in reality.
Because failures in life are finally that: a reality.
Lift your spirits. Pick up your shoulders. Look at the sky more than the tip of your feet. That defeats do not mark a wrinkle on your forehead or take away a minute of sleep. If he lives them, it means that he is walking. If you did not live them, you would be a failure.
Do not lose heart in your eagerness to work the earth and mud. With patience and good cheer. This way only one thing is certain: you will find the gold nugget you are looking for.
Processing failures is a way to collect success in advance.